12 Classic Songs That Give INFJs a Cringe Attack

INFJs have an intense, multi-faceted relationship with music and, just like every other part of our lives, it’s complicated. When other types are listening to music, we are feeling it. We feel music in our bodies (I know that’s weird, right?) and a single note can give us joy or make us cry.  

An INFJ friend once told me that she was at a religious ceremony in which a singing bowl was being played. When it came to this one, drawn out tone, she teared up. No words, no other instruments, and only one note. Wow.  

Music is a vehicle for the INFJ to experience their most authentic ideals and emotions. That’s because it brings what we feel to the surface so we can stare it in the face. We are looking for our sacred truth. A song can be a companion in our deepest melancholy or catapult us toward our most treasured dreams. 

But these 12 songs – let’s just say they have the opposite effect. All of these ‘classics’ make me cringe for various reasons, and before you say, “No way, I love that song!!” hear me out. I am only one INFJ, but I’ll bet many of my fellow Counselors will relate. 

1. Highway to Hell by AC/DC 

OK, INFJs like to dance with darkness sometimes, but this is just as silly as it is irritating. You’re happy about going to hell? I guess there’s a party there. And nobody’s gonna slow you down? Awe inspiring. Then put on your little devil horns and get on the road big guy, but don’t stop by my place if you get lost, or even if you're dying. You’ll be fine since “friends are gonna be there too” so, cheers, you can all party hearty with s’mores, together, around the fire. 

2. Stranglehold by Ted Nugent 

I know this is about songs, but on this one I have to call out the musician as the ultimate anti-INFJ (he’s probably an ESTP so literally our opposite). To me, Ted Nugent comes across as aggressive and in your face with an oversized ego to match. If you are an INFJ and you've ever gone to one of his concerts, you might have walked out. This song was so popular when I was young, and I’ll admit his guitar playing is some of the best. But “Stranglehold” is a perfect example of his style and message and describes a guy with a, you guessed it, stranglehold on a woman while bragging “I crushed your face.” Eww, yuck.  

3. Rock and Roll All Nite by Kiss 

Really? You want to rock ‘n’ roll all night, AND party every day? Is that really your entire purpose in life? I know, I know, it’s just a song. Except I know some folks who would love to go to a party every single day. I also know folks who would like to rock and roll all night, and I think they were my next-door neighbors. But I get it. Parties can be fun, especially for Extraverts, and rock and roll is the coolest. But this kind of loud, sensory overstimulation and meaningless gibberish that  the crowd “keeps on shoutin’”, every single night and day, makes me want to throw up a little.  

4. Macarena by Los del Río 

Have I danced the Macarena? Yes (but my Extraverted friends made me). In stronger moments, I avoid this repetitive, flamenco rhythm. It's an irritant, and it stays with me long after the song ends. Plus, the lyrics are just stupid. Macarena is tired of the first boyfriend, so she hangs out with two others. But that got boring, so she wants to find a new boyfriend in New York. Now there’s a poignant message. Something to ponder for us principled, altruistic INFJs.  

5. Jump by Van Halen 

So, nothing gets you down, and you’re the toughest guy around. Impressive. And the chick you’re hitting on has seen worse, so why not jump? Might as well. If the screechy, screamy vocals don’t entice you then for sure this guy’s romantic prowess will. He’s got the record machine and rolls with the punches because he’s seen the toughest around, and, well, he is tough. Did I already say that? OK, this song is literally about jumping for no discernable reason. Plus it hurts my  ears. Can you just jump somewhere else please?

6. Achy Breaky Heart by Billy Ray Cyrus 

Umm, I don’t think I need to explain.  

7. Still the One by Orleans 

Yes, this is a cute, upbeat song, but INFJ’s aren’t always moved by cuteness and they’re definitely not inspired by the practical. This is about a guy who is “settling” on the woman he has been with for a long time. And why not, they have the same address and the same friends. Nice. What more could you want? And yes, it’s sweet that their love grows better with age, but so does the balsamic vinegar I buy at Ralph’s. This is the opposite of the INFJ ideal of finding your soulmate, connecting with them deeply and intensely, and sharing a lifetime (and afterlife!). So yeah, kinda lets me down.  

8. Creep by Radiohead 

This is so sad and pathetic that I can’t listen to it. He can’t see himself as anything but a creep and a weirdo, and the self hatred is off the charts. You need to look into that, buddy, maybe get a therapist like yesterday. Her skin makes you cry? Are you sure that’s not her lotion? What’s going on inside you?? She’s not “just like an angel” if her effect is making you want to hurt yourself. But if I’m being fair, some INFJs suffer from co-dependency, and maybe this over-the-top description of it hits me in that place of potential. Hmm. No. I think “Creep” is just creepy. 

9. Every Breath You Take by The Police 

This one has recently been called out for its true colors. It's about a crazy guy who stalks his ex-girlfriend. But when I was young, people embraced it as a love song. Yet even as a young, inexperienced INFJ it made me cringe. I hadn’t really formed a solid idea about appropriate boundaries, but even so I knew it was completely spine-chilling. “Every step you take I’ll be watching you.” What?? Yikes. Astounding that this prowler and this song snuck right past most of us all those years ago.  

10. Do You Feel Like We Do by Peter Frampton 

OK, yes, I knew this song was about his hangover, but please, can’t you hear the visceral plea in the line “Do you, you feel like I do ...” Can’t you even hear it in the music? Can’t you? Don’t you hear him begging the listener to understand, to relate to his plight, to experience it with him? Don't judge me. I watched Howard Stern interview Frampton, and he also said he thought there was a deeper meaning in that line, and then I heard out of Frampton's own mouth that nope, he is asking whether you have a hangover too ... eye roll, heavy sigh.  

11. Ballroom Blitz by The Sweet  

Now here’s a fun one. The song was inspired by an incident in which the band was forced off stage by a frenzied mob and  “it was like lightning” and “everybody was frightening” and apparently, that’s a good time. So much so that they wrote this song to celebrate it. This is a perfect example of people who need so much stimulation that they scoff at danger. When “the man in the back said everyone attack” they experience this onslaught as the best party ever! Maybe I’m a dud, but count me out. 

12. I’ll be Home for Christmas by Kim Gannon 

This beloved Christmas song used to make me feel all tingly and hopeful for Christmas, and made me think of mistletoe and presents around the tree. Then it became the most disturbing song I’d ever heard. Why? Well, I learned that “only in my  dreams“ applied to American WWII soldiers who were fighting for us and for their lives in European, muddy trenches, and would not be home for Christmas, and might not be home at all. I had to write that quickly because if I  paused, I would cry. Kim Gannon tricked me on purpose. I know it and I’m not cringing, I’m mad.