How to Lower Your Neuroticism and Succeed in a High-Stress Job

Feeling stressed at work? If you score higher than average in Neuroticism on the Big Five personality test, you may respond to challenges differently than people who score lower. High-pressure environments cause you to feel anxious and worry, which can put you into a pattern of overthinking and focusing on what might go wrong. But there are practical ways to manage these reactions and reduce the impact of Neuroticism, helping you avoid imposter syndrome and burnout. 

While Neuroticism is often seen in a negative light, it isn’t all bad. By understanding how it affects you at work, you can address its challenges directly and make room for your strengths to come through. The following strategies can help you navigate a demanding job with more resilience and less stress.

Take an Emotional Inventory

People who score high in Neuroticism are often very aware of their emotional responses—they can recognize when they’re stressed, angry, sad or nervous. This awareness can be useful if you know how to work with it. One way is to take an emotional inventory:

1. When you notice an emotion rising, pause and ask yourself, what is behind this emotion?
2. Identify the underlying cause. Is it stress over a deadline? Is there a relationship in your life that’s not going well? Or is something else causing tension?
3. Allow yourself to feel the emotion, but don’t let it take over. Channel your anxiety or stress into a plan for your next task. Sometimes, anxiety can motivate you to move forward if you stay focused on your goals.
4. If the emotion isn’t related to work, make a note or set a reminder to address it later. This gives you a plan and lets you set the feeling aside for now.

Throughout this exercise, remind yourself that experiencing emotions more intensely than others isn’t inherently bad. In fact, it often comes with higher empathy, making you more attuned to those around you. This can help you support coworkers, clients and your boss, and build stronger, more genuine connections.

Ask for Help When You Need It

As someone with high Neuroticism, you may need extra support or reassurance. While this can sometimes feel like a weakness, asking for help is actually a strength when used thoughtfully. Your boss would likely prefer that you're honest about your needs over seeing you burn out.

Take a moment to collect your thoughts, then approach your boss or a teammate for a conversation. You might say:

• “I’ve noticed I’m feeling stretched thin with competing deadlines. Could we revisit the project timeline or look at prioritization together?”
• “I could use some help solving this problem, because right now the answer isn’t clear to me.”

It’s also helpful to build a support system at work. Find a colleague you trust or look for a mentor on your team who can offer reassurance when you need it.

Talk Back to Your Inner Critic

A strong inner critic is common with high Neuroticism, but you don’t have to accept every negative thought it offers. At work, this voice might sound like, “I knew I shouldn’t have done that,” “I’ll never get that promotion,” or “My boss doesn’t like me.” To shift this pattern, try to challenge these thoughts.

Think of your inner critic as an alarm system that’s a bit too sensitive. It’s meant to protect you from mistakes or embarrassment, but often it acts like a faulty smoke alarm—going off at the smallest spark. When you catch yourself thinking something negative or self-deprecating, respond with a more balanced, realistic thought. For example, if you think, “If I make a mistake, I’ll ruin everything I’ve worked for,” counter it with, “One mistake doesn’t define my performance. What matters is how I recover—I’ve overcome mistakes before, and I can do it again.”

Regulate Your Nervous System with Mindfulness

When you’re under high stress, your nervous system reacts—your heart rate speeds up, you might feel shame or panic, and your mind can start to spiral. While everyone experiences these moments, people high in Neuroticism may notice them more often, especially in demanding workplaces.

To manage this, try incorporating quick, mindful breaks into your day. When you feel overwhelmed, pause for a minute to use a breathing technique like the 4-7-8 method, take a mindful walk around the office and count your steps to refocus, or stretch to release physical tension.

Even a brief moment of mindfulness can help calm your nervous system and clear your mind, making it easier to move forward or create a plan for what’s next

Take “Stress Notes”

Stress has a way of lingering, following you home and occupying your thoughts long after the workday ends. Maybe something went wrong earlier, and hours later, you still feel unsettled. One way to break this cycle is to face the stress directly by giving it a place outside your mind.

Try keeping a journal or a simple list at work to jot down what’s bothering you. Once you’ve written it out, take a moment to brainstorm possible solutions. Not every stressor will have an immediate answer, but writing it down can help you release some of the worry and regain control over your thoughts

Don’t Participate in Workplace Drama

Workplace negativity or drama can drain your energy, so it’s important to protect your emotional bandwidth where you can. While it’s unrealistic to avoid all unhealthy competition or negative comments, you can limit your exposure to make your work environment feel calmer.

Consider muting communication channels that aren’t essential to your productivity, like random group chats or social threads. Avoid spending too much time around particularly negative colleagues, and don’t hesitate to excuse yourself from venting sessions if you need to.

Setting boundaries with certain coworkers may be necessary to maintain your peace. Remember, if you’re highly sensitive to others’ emotions, you tend to absorb the mood around you. The key is to manage your exposure to emotionally charged situations and remind yourself that emotions will pass if you let them go.

Practice Self-Compassion and Self-Praise At and Outside of Work

It might sound silly, but giving yourself a pat on the back is a key part of building self-esteem when your mind is racing. If a minor mistake starts to feel overwhelming, that’s a sign to pause and reset your view of yourself.

Try speaking to yourself the way you would to a friend. Acknowledge that mistakes happen, then ask what you can learn from the situation. This approach helps you move forward and take action, rather than getting stuck dwelling on what went wrong.

People high in Neuroticism often overlook their achievements. When something goes well, take a moment to recognize it. If you’re dealing with a setback, quickly remind yourself of recent successes. Running through a mental list of what’s gone right can help put challenges in perspective and make small missteps feel less significant.

A Few Other Helpful Tips

• Schedule time to worry. Set aside a 10-minute window outside of work to focus on your concerns. Give yourself permission not to revisit those worries until it’s time to address them. Often, you’ll find that some worries resolve on their own or weren’t worth the energy in the first place.
• Ground yourself before high-pressure days or events. Some days or tasks will naturally feel more stressful. Prepare by starting the day in a good emotional state. Try calming activities beforehand: repeat a mantra or affirmation, practice deep breathing, stretch, do a quick yoga session, organize your workspace, or watch a calming video—whatever helps you feel at ease.
• Ask for feedback. Regular feedback from your boss or colleagues can clarify what you’re doing well and what can be improved. This helps prevent unnecessary worry about your performance and gives you actionable steps to focus on.
• Remember your motivation. Remind yourself why you’re in your role—whether it’s a goal, a passion or a long-term dream. Focusing on the bigger picture and your achievements so far can help you stay grounded when the day gets tough.

The Bottom Line 

Lowering your Neuroticism is really about managing your emotional energy so you can focus on your goals. Use the strengths that come with Neuroticism—self-awareness, empathy and problem-solving—to spot challenges early, build meaningful relationships and create action plans. Even if you can’t solve every problem, you can still regulate your emotional response to it and be better prepared for ups and downs. High stress might come with high rewards, but you don’t have to feel stressed all the time to succeed. By managing your reactions and using your strengths, you can make stress work for you, not against you.