The Hustle is Dead — Here’s How to Embrace the ‘Soft Life’

Have you “girl-bossed” your way into the ground? Maybe you’ve hustled a little too close to the sun and now you need a week — and then some — in bed to recover. It’s a common experience. Nearly half of US working adults say they feel burned out or “emotionally drained” by work, according to SHRM, which tells us that living with your nose pressed against the grindstone is not sustainable, nor is it healthy. 

So … why not simply stop? No, seriously. What if you could reject burn-out culture and take things slow for once? 

Far from ploughing a lonely field, hundreds of thousands of individuals have already taken this step and joined the ‘soft life’ movement. This mindset rejects the constant hustle and grind for a slower, more intentional lifestyle focused on rest, ease, self-care and balance.

Why Are We Rejecting Burnout Culture?

If you’re thinking about adopting a ‘soft life,’ chances are you’re not the only one. Type the words, plus a hashtag, into TikTok, and you’ll find more than 300,000 videos waxing lyrical on the subject. The timing is interesting. It points to a cascade of events that have been happening recently, all of which are forcing people to reconsider what truly matters (spoiler: getting everything on the to-do list done is not it). 

The pandemic was a wake-up call

Five years have passed since the pandemic, and we’re only now beginning to fully grasp the greater impact it had on the world. Since lockdowns forced us to stay inside for months at a time, it changed our mindset when it comes to work and the cult of presenteeism.

“Since COVID, more work has shifted to an at-home or hybrid model and more is expected of the worker,” says Robert Roopa, Clinical Psychologist at, OCD and Anxiety Clinic of Ontario and Counselling Services for York Region. “The pressures of having to meet these demands are likely increasing the rate of burnout among employees.” Far from being the model for a better work/life balance, remote work has become an excuse to blur the lines and demand even more of ourselves. People are seeing just how much they’ve been sacrificing for work and questioning whether it’s worth it.

We’re prioritizing mental health

Brace yourself:  90% of Americans say the US is experiencing a ‘mental health crisis’ — and the word they use is 'crisis', not merely a 'problem'. This is big. We’re more open about our mental health than ever, and the stigma is finally beginning to break down. This is indicative of a move towards prioritizing our mental health — not only speaking openly about it but also making the right choices to support it.  

Younger generations are pushing back

Generational differences are not simply stereotypes. Each generation has a specific set of characteristics, often shaped by the big events of their youth and the cultural environment they grew up in. And an emerging trait of Gen Z is the desire to carve their own path. They’re choosing to prioritize their mental and emotional well-being over traditional mantras of success, like “work your way up the corporate ladder” and “put in your time.” 

“Increasingly, people are realizing how unsustainable hustle culture truly is, instead asking for balance and lifestyles centered on wellness over productivity at all cost,” says Niloufar Esmaeilpou is a Registered Clinical Counsellor & Approved Supervisor, Founder at Lotus Therapy & Counselling Centre. “The young might also lead the change in cultural attitudes to work, placing meaningfulness and personal fulfillment from work as priorities.”

In other words, with younger generations pushing back on hustle culture, it’s likely that the rest of us will follow suit. So, when we see them advocating for more flexible schedules, hybrid working and time to rest and recuperate, it’s only natural that organizations will start to take notice and make changes too.

Burnout is physically dangerous

Burnout is one of those words that we throw around casually, but people are finally waking up to the fact that it can cause or contribute  to physical health issues — it’s a physical manifestation of the stress you’ve been experiencing.

“If left untreated, burnout can raise the risk for other mental health issues, like anxiety and depression, as well as affect your relationships and overall quality of life,” says Cathy Sullivan-Windt, licensed psychologist and owner of New Connections Counseling Center. “Prolonged exposure to stress can also impact your physical health over time, leading to weight gain, high cholesterol, type 2 diabetes, heart disease, irritable bowel syndrome, muscle and joint pain, breathing problems, and even an increased risk of death,” she explains. 

When thought of in this way, it’s no surprise that people are starting to rebel against a culture that promotes pushing yourself to exhaustion.

How to Adopt the ‘Soft Life,’ According to Experts

Embracing a ‘soft life’ can lead to less stress, more meaning and a generally happier time on this planet. But how can you make it happen? We asked the experts for their advice on adopting this lifestyle — and you only need to make a few small changes to get started.

1. Consider your goals, not someone else’s

Are you living up to someone else’s version of perfection? Rather than laboring to meet someone else’s goals — and that includes your boss — think about what it is that you want and value in life.

“Sometimes we get caught up in what others expect from us and lose track of what we really want to do or what makes us feel good,” says Sullivan-Windt. “I would recommend taking some time to really think about what matters most to you and the goals — both professional and personal — you want to achieve in the short and long-term.”

2. Ask yourself, what do you need from life? 

All too often, we push down our needs in favor of giving other people what they want. More than people-pleasing, this is a symptom of the many expectations that are placed upon us to be a good employee, friend and family member. However, de-prioritizing your own needs can be an act of self betrayal. When you’re leaning into a softer life, one of the first steps is listening to what you truly need in life and putting those needs on at least an equal footing to others. 

“In the context of mental health, it places immense emphasis on minimizing stress, establishing healthy boundaries, and paying attention to one's needs without guilt,” says Esmaeilpou. As an exercise, get a pen and paper and create two columns. In one, list what you need to be happy and healthy. In the other, list what you want from life to be happier. Once you have completed this list, think about ways you can start incorporating these needs and wants into your daily life.

3. Spend your time wisely

Time is our most valuable resource — make sure you use it wisely. “Soft living involves making conscious choices that help improve the quality of life, such as spending time on hobbies, nurturing relationships and being mindful,” says Esmaeilpou. So, be conscious of how you use your time. Are you sitting and doom-scrolling on social media after work? Does this actually bring you joy? Or would you be better off spending that time taking a walk, reading a book or cooking a meal with your loved ones?

Remember, time is a finite resource and it’s up to you to decide how you use it.

4. Speak up if you’re overwhelmed

Do you have too much on your figurative plate? When you’re feeling overwhelmed, don’t drown under your own responsibilities. Instead, speak up and let people know. Learning to say ‘no’ (within reason) can help you regain control over your time and, in effect, your life.

“Equally important is learning to delegate when possible and to communicate openly about one's limits to avoid taking on excessive burdens,” says Esmaeilpou. That may mean telling your boss that you’ve got too many tasks to complete or offloading some of your duties where possible. Taking action is better than suffering in silence. And remember, there’s nothing honorable about working excessively hard when it damages your mental health.

5. Set aside time for yourself

We all talk about ‘me time,’ but few of us actually have it. When was the last time you set aside an hour or two to do something for yourself? It might feel unfamiliar at first, but that’s all the more reason to do it. Giving yourself the gift of free time is one of the best forms of self-care.

“Schedule personal time in your calendar, and treat it with the same level of importance as work-related appointments,” suggests Sullivan-Windt. If you feel as though you have no time for yourself, you need to change that. What mindless tasks can you outsource or delegate? What activities can you say no to? 

Forget the Deadlines and Breathe! 

The anti-burnout revolution won’t be loud and messy. It will be quiet, and slow, and actually kind of beautiful. Achieving a ‘soft life’ means taking a step back, reassessing what you need from life, and having the courage to protect that. We’re not claiming that it’s easy, but it’s most certainly worth it.