How Each Enneagram Type Hosts Thanksgiving Dinner
Thanksgiving is all about bringing people together for a good feast and shared gratitude, but how the day goes can vary wildly depending on who’s hosting. Whether it’s the aunt who perfectly curates every detail down to hand-lettered place tags or the spontaneous cousin whose “potluck” really means everyone’s grabbing takeout on the way, every Enneagram type brings their own flavor to the Thanksgiving table.
From disorganized chaos to impeccable presentation and everything in between, here’s how each Enneagram type takes on the art—and occasional madness—of hosting Thanksgiving.
Enneagram One: The Perfectionistic Planner
Enneagram Type One brings all their “Perfectionist” energy to the forefront on Thanksgiving. When they host dinner, everything runs like a well-oiled machine. They will have a gorgeous centerpiece, complete with matching napkins and place settings with everyone’s name clearly marked on a place card. They’ll put their all into perfecting dishes and polishing their etiquette (all without a hair out of place).
They may not quite go so far as having a spreadsheet documenting who is bringing what dish and when everyone is arriving, but they’ve definitely planned around it. In fact, it’s likely that a One will politely steer guests away from the kitchen, not because they’re unwelcoming, but because they genuinely want everything to be under control and up to their own standards. Hosting is their way of making sure the day unfolds just right.
All that planning can feel uncomfortable for those who would rather spend the holiday relaxing than planning out every hour of bonding time. Nonetheless, this hosting style comes from a place of care—an Enneagram One’s fear of being seen as anything other than perfect.
Enneagram Two: The Warm-Hearted, Motherly Host
When you enter a cozy home with a roaring fire and the scent of cinnamon candles wafting through the air, you’re probably having Thanksgiving dinner at an Enneagram Type Two’s home. Twos handle the holiday with one goal in mind—to make everyone feel comfortable and loved through hors d’oeuvres and hospitality.
Type Two hosts flit more than they sit. They’ll move around the table, serving their guests and filling gaps in conversation to ensure everyone feels appreciated and seen. After the meal, don’t be surprised if they hand you a slice of pie in a to-go box to take home.
Guests may feel uncomfortable if they see the Type Two doing far too much and overexerting themselves to please everyone. But rest assured, this is Type Two’s way of expressing their love—even if they quietly hope someone notices their efforts and returns the favor.
Enneagram Three: The Magazine-Worthy Thanksgiving Host
Type Three views hosting Thanksgiving as a competition they want to win. Their Thanksgiving table and decor will look like a magazine spread, complete with flawless lighting and crystal glassware. Every detail is curated for optimum wow on Instagram.
Beyond the tablescape, they’ll pour their energy into shaping an experience that leaves guests genuinely impressed. Expect to be greeted with the latest on-trend cocktail and a round of trivia where every question is linked to a guest’s fun fact (“Which cousin once met Beyoncé?”). Great food, great conversation, fascinating guests—this is a host who truly brings A game.
Those looking for a more intimate or traditional Thanksgiving may worry that the meaning of the holiday is getting lost in all the show. That’s not the Three’s intention. They’re just creating a chic experience because being admired matters to them and they want their guests to appreciate all that effort.
Enneagram Four: The Creative Host Who’s All About Atmosphere
Guests might be delighted—or a bit surprised—by how a Type Four host interprets the holiday traditions. They’re going to put their own spin on the tableware, lighting, food and playlist, and they’ll curate those details to create a specific mood. Changes could be as small as swapping a pumpkin pie for a sweet potato pie, or as large as preparing a vegan feast with recipes inspired by the host’s travels. Either way, the Four is layering on aesthetics to make the day feel special and unique, rather than just a standard gathering.
Type 4s can feel nostalgic or wistful during holidays, and they won’t shy away from deep, sentimental conversations. The day might not be “perfect” or even “authentic” by traditional standards, but it will absolutely stick in your mind for the host’s heart and originality.
Some Turkey-loving guests may struggle to understand the Four’s creative vision. But the Type Four needs to express their individuality as it helps them manage their fear that they’re “less than” or existentially flawed.
Enneagram Five: The Understated Host
Instead of an extensive guest list, Type Five will keep things small and quiet, a place where everyone can relax without pressure and enjoy real conversation. A Five will pay attention to details that help guests feel comfortable, like making sure there’s a quiet space for anyone who needs a break. They’re less likely to go overboard on the fancy dinner and elaborate centerpieces, because they just don’t care about putting on a show.
Over dinner, the Five will happily engage in good conversations about almost any topic, except the drama-filled ones. If there’s an emotional person at the table, the Five might struggle to steer the conversation to a comfortable topic and instead disappear into the kitchen for the hundredth time. They’ll gladly explain the thermodynamics of cooking and baking to whoever will listen, though.
Although their hospitality is more understated, guests will enjoy the low-key atmosphere and thoughtful conversation. Don’t worry if they step outside for breaks. Type Five just needs alone time to save their energy, especially after being around people.
Enneagram Six: The Over-Prepared Host
When your Type Six family member hosts Thanksgiving, you can expect everything to run smoothly. They take their fear of unpreparedness and danger into the holiday and overplan to ward off any mishaps. They take great care to cook the turkey to perfection, and have a few backup side dishes in the fridge in case the food runs out.
The Six is not prepared to the point of having a backup generator in case the house loses power—that’s overkill even for this vigilant type. But you can count on a seating plan that keeps squabbling relatives far away from each other and communication tactics that head off loaded subjects like politics. The Six is the host most likely to feel genuinely grateful for everyone being together and safe, and they’ll probably give a heartfelt toast that warms you up inside.
Their preparedness might look a little over the top, but they simply want everything to go off without a hitch. And they especially want to preserve all the important relationships in their life. One thing is for certain: if a Six invites you to their Thanksgiving gathering, you’re in their inner circle of trust.
Enneagram Seven: The Fun-Loving Party Host
A Thanksgiving dinner at a Type Seven’s home might seem more like a backyard tailgate or cocktail party than a traditional celebration. This personality type will do everything they can to make the day happy and fun.
They won’t care if they burn the dinner rolls or forget to baste the turkey. They’ll laugh off any failures and focus on making their guests feel like VIPs. Expect this type of Thanksgiving gathering to include karaoke, jello shots and party games, because Type Seven doesn’t want anyone looking glum or bored on their watch. And they’re honestly grateful to savor all the delight and excitement of the people they love.
Guests might be concerned about the disorganization and their host’s laissez-faire vibe, but they’ll forget about their worries once they join the party. For Seven, Thanksgiving is all about joy, and they’ll energetically keep the negativity at bay.
Enneagram Eight: The Confident Organizer
Type Eight will step into their hosting role with gusto. They take charge of everything, but cleverly don’t do everything because they’re so great at rallying the troops to set the table and handle the cleanup. They leave their mark in grander ways, like giving a speech and carving the turkey.
This type might come off as intense while they’re finishing their prep, and their project management style can sound like blunt order. But once they can relax and enjoy dinner with their guests, Type Eight will calm down and settle into a more subdued mood—until someone brings up a touchy topic, that is!
Type Eight may run a tough ship, try to control everything and get a bit argumentative, but they’ll use their can-do energy to make sure their guests have everything they need. Some may feel put off by their assertive approach—especially when the Eight goes hard on a controversial topic—but that drive to take charge really comes from wanting to protect themselves and the people they care about.
Enneagram Nine: The Chill, Peaceful Host
Type Nine hosts Thanksgiving by ensuring everyone is relaxed and having a good time. Their vibe is easy-going, and they’ll make that come across in good food (all dietary requirements accommodated) and warm conversation. Contentious topics are gracefully sidestepped because there’s no space for arguments at this table.
Nines might struggle to deal with a more challenging personality, and there’s always someone who gets heated, but they’ll quietly do their best to smooth things over. When conflict appears, they instinctively flip to mediator mode, asking for a change of subject or quickly laying out a board game, so it almost seems like nothing happened.
Most guests will feel at home with Type Nine’s calming presence, and the evening will feel effortless as long as everyone gets along. Nines are happiest in stable, positive surroundings and go above and beyond to please their guests.
