What Type of Dinner Guest You'd Be, Based on Your Enneagram Type
Hosting a dinner party and trying to figure out who to seat where? Or maybe you just don’t understand why you got invited once but not again ... and wondering if your personality had anything to do with it?
Well, we're breaking it all down—because whether you’re chewing with your mouth closed or bragging about the wine you've chosen, your Enneagram is definitely showing, even at the dinner table.
Type One: Human Version of a To-do List
If you invite a Type One to your dinner party, congratulations—you’ve scored yourself an extra host. They'll arrive early (because it’s polite, duh), help set the table, and sneakily relocate your slightly crooked cutlery to "fix" it. They're sticklers for etiquette, so expect them to pass from the left and keep their elbows off the table.
During the meal, they'll have an almost encyclopedic knowledge of food provenance and ethics. The chicken? They'll want to know if it’s free-range. The wine? They may casually mention it comes from a vineyard with the highest rate of synthetic pesticide usage, but no hard feelings. Ones are typically thoughtful conversationalists, though their candor may come off as blunt: “This soup is lovely, but if I may suggest, a pinch more thyme would balance the acidity.”
If debates arise (especially about morality or the environment), they won't shy away from politely but firmly sharing their perspective—their inner critic wouldn’t allow otherwise. Bonus points? They’ll text you a heartfelt “thank you” afterward and maybe even Venmo you $20 “for desserts.”
Most likely to: Arrive with a helpful dish labeled "Organic, gluten-free and portioned for zero waste" and swap the host’s Spotify queue with a curated list of “classical music for refined conversation.”
Type Two: The Overhelper
Twos arrive with gifts—flowers, wine or a homemade casserole so intense you’ll wonder if they had a team of sous chefs helping out. These nurturers can’t help but center their evening around making sure everyone else is comfortable, to the point where they'll take over your hosting duties: “Why don’t I handle the appetizers? You deserve to relax!”
At the table, Twos are all about connection. You’ll find them saying phrases like “Wait, you didn’t get any bread? Here, take mine," while neglecting their own plate as they silently ensure that everyone is happy. They’re also paying close attention to dining dynamics: Who looks nervous? Who hasn’t spoken? They’ll pull everyone into the conversation with questions like, “Didn’t you once go to Rome, too? Tell us about that!” or suggest that Miles and Lucy swap places for better “vibes”.
After three hours of “Let me refill your drink! Did you try the dip? Your hair looks stunning!” they start to get annoyed that there hasn't been a group hug yet and no one is reciprocating their compliments. Rather than speak up, they'll quietly pout and call a taxi at 10 pm “to avoid the traffic”.
Most likely to: Pull out a backup dessert from their bag: “I brought chocolate cake… and brownies… and fruit salad. Just in case!”
Type Three: Builds Their Personal Brand
Threes arrive early so there's more time for everyone to admire their outfit and take pictures of their “artisanal, locally sourced and Instagrammable” dish (yes, even if they’re just bringing chips). They’re fabulously charming from the get-go, effortlessly navigating groups and conversations like a politician shaking hands.
They tell captivating stories over dinner, subtly name-dropping their latest promotion or their weekend trip to Napa. Expect humblebrags about "accidentally" choosing the perfect vintage wine for the meal (“Oh gosh, this wine? It’s just something I picked up while chatting with the vineyard owner last month!”).
Competitiveness may flare if someone else starts to steal the spotlight—call it a Three's survival instinct. They’ll quickly pivot and slyly mention their big achievement to trump the last speaker: “Speaking of storms, have you heard about my new app for disaster preparedness? It’s trending!” Despite this, the Three genuinely loves to host or attend parties where they can shine while helping others feel celebrated, too.
Most likely to: Exit with the message “I should go soon—early meeting tomorrow!" leaving behind a stack of business cards and their latest Forbes cover.
Type Four: Passes the Salt With a Metaphor
Fours show up dressed like their invite came with a theme, whether it did or not. Known for their unique aesthetic and intense personal flair, they’ll probably gravitate toward the most dimly lit corner of your dining space as it is “symbolic of my melancholy,” and then make lots of small talk about the meaninglessness of small talk (“I’m sorry if I seem distant—I’m just processing the futility of social gatherings.”)
Expect them to have Opinions™. Good wine? Fours appreciate the artistry behind it and will wax poetic about grape origins. Bland food? They’ll politely say, “It’s good,” though their soul screams for truffle oil or hand-whipped aioli to liven it up. They adore long, deep conversations and might inquire about everyone’s favorite childhood memory to trigger nostalgia, or conversations about “the crushing loneliness of The Little Mermaid” over dessert.
Fours love sharing emotionally resonant stories but often self-monitor for "too much vulnerability." Don’t be shocked if they momentarily withdraw mid-conversation or turn to self-deprecating humor: “I hope my dish isn’t too much—I tend to overcomplicate things. Like my feelings. And my life.”
Most likely to: Accidentally turn the evening into a therapy session, then storm out dramatically after someone says they've never seen Avatar.
Type Five: The Curious Quiet Observer
Expect Fives to wander in with a book under one arm (just in case things get dull) and an intriguing question prepared for the host. They’ll spend the evening observing the crowd like a sociologist, muttering “Interesting,” and mentally calculating how they can “participate” (if you can call it that) without having to engage much at all.
During dinner, they won't turn a chat about the weather into a lecture on the thermodynamics of climate change because please, they're not that stereotypical. But they will be thinking about Hadley cell circulation patterns while everyone else discusses how much they love summer.
Fives aren't big on small talk, but most will perk up when someone mentions something that catches their interest: perhaps the history of coffee or an obscure indie film. Then, you’ll notice their enthusiasm ignites like wildfire, for about 20 minutes until they run out of things to say and their mental battery drains to 5%.
Most likely to: Turn the evening into a TED Talk, then leave mid-sentence to “research the topic further”, coincidentally when people start offering to help with the clean up.
Type Six: The Awkward Second Guesser
Sixes want events to be smooth, safe and maybe just a bit predictable. They’ll likely confirm the address twice, the menu thrice, and still will come armed with “safety” dishes in case the oven breaks down mid-meal.
At the table, Sixes do their best to join the conversation while nervously laughing at their own jokes. But an eyebrow twitch from across the table can make them overthink. Did they hog too much dip? Did their recommendations for a bug spray subscription make them seem paranoid? Cue an awkward pause until a friend nods at them reassuringly. Then they’ll get back to being the chatty, loyal pal you know and love. After four more drinks.
Sixes have no chill when it comes to political discussions, and everyone knows they're one Truman Show meta-theory away from a meltdown. They'll happily discuss their work (they find stability in routines) but hate being "on display" for others' entertainment. Be careful not to put them on the spot with compliments or they’ll take it as pressure to perform: “Oh god, do you want me to say something funny now?" (Cue awkward silence.)
Most likely to: Accidentally reveal more private information than intended during Never Have I Ever after a few glasses of wine. This type has layers, and alcohol will peel them all away.
Type Seven: The High-Energy Crowd Pleaser
If you’re hosting a dinner with a Seven, buckle up—your party just got its spark. They’ll walk in beaming, juggling cocktails, a platter of mini tacos, sushi, brownies and a dozen baby cupcakes: “I figured variety keeps things interesting, you never know what we might be in the mood for!"
Sevens love to roll with the punches and keep an open schedule, so don't be surprised if they show up early ("to make the playlist!"), late ("Sorry, got invited to a jam session on the way here!"), or cancel a week before (“I’m feeling more of a hot tub vibe that night, you know?"). But once they’re in the room, Sevens make sure everyone else is having fun. They’ll hop from conversation to conversation to get to know everyone, using their charm and quick wit to bring out the best in others.
A Seven's biggest fear is being trapped in boredom. Expect them to cut off Aunt Margaret’s story about her rose garden after one too many details, then suggest playing Heads Up! to get everyone up and moving. They'll be the life of the party until they receive a mystery text from someone else's dinner party, then they'll quietly slip out the back door without warning.
Most likely to: Suggest backyard camping with ghost stories after dinner, then wake up at 5 am to make pancakes for the group while blasting Beyoncé's "Love On Top". Because why not?
Type Eight: The Dinner Party Dominator
Eights don’t “attend” dinners—they run them. Arriving like a (wo)man with a mission, they’ll quickly scan the room, identify the power players, then take over whatever task that person was doing because they’re more efficient and organized (read: better) than everyone else. (Proceeds to glaze the ham with an “I’ve got this” smirk.)
Eights aren’t subtle, so don’t be surprised if the chili they brought is so spicy it could melt steel, or a glass gets slammed on the table while they make a point about something. They love to debate, and they love to win. If the other guests look like they're winding down from passionate converation, Eights will change the game: “Let’s play poker! But real stakes—no Monopoly money.” (Proceeds to win every hand.)
Despite this intensity, an Eight’s softer side often peeks through. They’ll defend quieter guests if they’re feeling talked over and ensure that fairness reigns supreme. And yes—they’ll help you carry the heavy roasting pan, no questions asked.
Most likely to: Offer to host the next dinner and then turn it into a full-blown cook out with synchronized fireworks. Because why not take it up a notch?
Type Nine: The Peace Treaty
Nines are the dinner guest dream. They arrive on time with a “crowd-pleasing” fruit salad, sit in the middle of the table to “keep the peace between Leroy and Pam", and spend the evening nodding along to everyone’s opinions and keeping the conversation flowing. Honestly, you'd pay them if they weren't so humble.
Unfortunately, that's also the problem: You've literally no clue if they're enjoying the meal (“I’ll just have whatever’s leftover") or the conversation ("Let's agree to disagree!"). They won't even pick a side on the pineapple-on-pizza debate. Nines would rather blend in than rock the boat, even if it means eating an allergen and getting hives, or talking about sports stats for two hours straight.
Occasionally, you’ll spot a Nine deep in thought with a tiny furrow between their brows—likely debating whether or not they should speak up about that one topic (and then deciding against it). They'll offer to clean up when the party gets too loud or argumentative, and then exit stage left when the dishes are done.
Most likely to: Memorize 50 kids' jokes before the party to defuse any awkwardness, but disappear when it's their turn to share anything personal. You all want popcorn, right?
